On Judas Nationality
Another one that made it onto the Danny Baker Show. I'm *such* a media whore.
Some years ago I was working for the government out in the Far East. I ended up staying for a week on the US Air Force base on the Japanese island of Okinawa.
This looked a cushy little number right up to the moment I tried to get hold of something to eat --- I piled up my tray in the canteen and walked to the till.
"What's your social security number?" asked the girl on the till.
I told her. My British one, and her eyes lit up with the words "Does not compute."
"Sorry sir," she said, the word 'sir' telling me all I need to know, "We can't serve you without a valid US social security number."
I went back to the boss and told him of my ordeal, and he gave me a fake number on the spot on the proviso that I be American for the week.
I balked, but the alternative being starved amongst the *cough* well-built US servicemen, I caved in.
"And I'm making you a captain in the Air Force" he said by way of a bonus.
Nobody has told me I no longer hold this rank, so as far as I'm concerned I still am a captain in the US Air Force. In fact, I think after ten years, I'm due a promotion.