Dear Mr DuckThank you for the final payment on your account, which is now cleared. Thank you for being a customer with us.
Please note you have been charged £1.25 for a paper copy of this notice.
Send payment of the balance to us within 14 working days.
Yours etc,
Bastard Corp
So I reply...
Dear Bastard Corp
Thank you for your letter advising me that my account was fully paid.
I also note your demand for £1.25, being your company's fee for telling me my account balance is now clear, which I am happy to pay.
Please note that you have been charged £1.26 for a paper copy of this notice.
Send payment of the balance of £0.01 to us within 14 working days.
Your move.
S Duck, BSc (Hons)
12 comments:
Ooh 0.0001st.
Well?
Have they sent a cheque yet - with yet another letter telling you the balance has been cleared, again with another fee for telling you?
Money for jam eh?
Oh ... Secco and turd!
Was that in their Terms and Conditions?
Did you add a codicil that payment may be made by way of faecal express?
I love it! Tell me how this plays out, please. =)
Dear Mr Duck.
Your credit score - go check.
Yours,
Bastard Corp
(150 Years of Screwing People to Death)
Burn the bureaucrats, now.
GT
Richard: My credit score isn't worth the paper I used to wipe my arse on.
Mine also. I love it when creditors threaten me with "It'll affect your credit score if you miss yet another payment".
Me, too. Mine's alread off the scale.
But you know what they say, Mr. Duck. Take care of the pennies and the pounds will take care of themselves.
dear mr. duck,
in light of all the freebies whence we have bestowed, we are now collecting.
office furniture, overdue bal of $9,000.00 usd s.
porno $10,000.00 usd s.
stationary 500 pence.
duck and geese diapers your soul for eternity.
your lovely, small but quaint estate auction block at $5.00
we could buy your lamps, anything for a wonderful customer such as u scary.
see everything comes at a price, whether we /u like it or not.
and since its been 12 long years, we can only wait 1 month.
payments in full via western union, credit, cash, or check to be endorsed to
the devil's domain who is insane.....
chow scary.......................
signed the devil.
at http://thedevilsdomaininsaneforevermoreyoursoul.comblogspot.hotspot/hotterthanhell////...com
(one ding-dang long link oh but well worth the wait.
A rival Bastard Corp could make a good ad out of that.
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