Great excitement at the Duck household as my new shed arrives, the old one being removed due to entirely unfounded fears of contamination.Imagine my surprise, then, as I find that my new out building has been delivered to me encased in vac-pack.
You couldn't even get through the door for use as an emergency latrine without negotiating the impenetrable wall of plastic with a variety of kitchen implements.
At least – looking on the bright side – it'll never get wet, even when the next sou'wester comes roaring over Chesil Beach.
Other things which shouldn't arrive in vac-pack:
- Vaccum cleaners
- Bubble wrap
- Vac-pack
- Elephants (unless you are catering for a particularly large barbecue and wish to keep the steaks fresh)
- Relatives (ditto)
Can't wait to see how the new greenhouse arrives. Filled to the brim with those little polystyrene balls, I should imagine.
Or deep-fried. Who can tell these days?
8 comments:
Did you consider getting a plumber in to help set-up your shed?
What was the old one contaminated with?
No, no, forget I asked....
It was not the contamination, but the fear of contamination. Fear is our greatest enemy. And can be obtained in easy to use doses, vacuum packed for freshness at most branches of the MOD and Al Qaeda superstores.
Heh. MOD surplus; evidence, if any is required, of efficiency savings that could be made in the military.
Sixth, after the spammer. How many relatives have you 'kept fresh'?
I'd rather enjoy seeing my relatives vac-packed and put up in storage in some warehouse someplace....hey, maybe you've got some room in that smart looking shed of yours.
Vac packed stuff isn't as annoying as those hard plasic "bubbles" that are sealed around the edges in such a manner that only the toughest of scissors will cut through it all, and even then you get your hands shredded to pieces by the sharp edges.
Also cable ties on stuff. Especially when the thing you're buying is scissors so that you can cut the bloody things off and the scissors are cable tied down...
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